I have realized that I need to accept the fact that I am really not that fast. I mean, I know that I am not, but I am not getting any faster. It was exciting to improve and start getting overall awards in smaller races, but I have stopped improving. It has nothing to do with having a kid or any injury. I have added speed work and still do not improve. I have added rest days and still have not improved. It’s just not in me. Maybe I am suited for another sport. Maybe I can blame my completely non-athletic parents. I cant blame myself for not trying, because I certainly tried. This fall I will focus on running races for fun again. And running for fun. Screw the speed work. I can’t compete with 13 yr old freaks of nature and my highly competitive age group.
I don’t think this fall’s marathon will be my last and I am not going to bust myself up trying to PR. I am going to try a duathlon and do more cycling. If running is making me feel down on myself, then clearly I need to try something new.