Monthly Archives: October 2012

that thing is gonna bake our beans

This past weekend I decided to test my 5k skillz and run the Cocoa Beano.  Packet pick up was next to the sponsoring candy store, so I just had to pick up some chocolate creams while I was there.  The cost for the run was 40 bucks!, but I signed up late and they give out fleece jackets instead of shirts.  The first year they gave away a poo colored (chocolate colored?)  fleece vest and hat.  This year it was all black, so it looked pretty sleek until I stepped into my house and it attracted every dog hair in the vicinity.

The morning of the race was sunny but COLD, probably around 30 degrees.  I wore long sleeves and a knit hat.  I was super nervous again and told myself it would be my last race of the year and that I would never have to do another 5k ever.  I ran for about 10 minutes to warm-up and then lined up near the starting line.  It was chip timing but awards based on clock.  The gun went off and I saw a 12 yr old that is in one my classes that I visit at the jr high take off super fast.  I knew she would beat me because she has been running 12 minutes in her 2 mile cross country races.  A few other ladies were ahead of me, but I just wanted to feel comfortable and steady as I ran.  The course was basically an out and back so I liked that I could always see who was ahead of me.  The clock at mile 1 read 6:15 and, based on my splits, I suspect that it was actually short of a mile.  The two mile mark was just after the turnaround and I was feeling good, in fourth place until I passed another lady.  The other two were too fast to catch so I just wanted to get as fast a time as possible.  Pre race I decided to try for 21 minutes.  After passing mile 2 at 13 minutes, I decided to try for sub 20.  After 2.5 miles I suddenly felt fatigued.  Just kind of drained overall.  Once we neared the finish line I kicked it up a few notches again and saw the clock switch over to 20 minutes.  I came in at 20:06 but it took me 3 seconds to cross the start line, so my time was 20:03.  I had no idea, but apparently the next lady was only 3 seconds behind me.  The first two finished around 19:30.  Hopefully I can get back down to the 19s again.

I won my age group, but I have won it for the past 2 years and never got my award.  I try emailing the race director but never get a response.  So hopefully it’s not a trophy full of chocolate.  After the race they only had hot chocolate.  I think they had bars last year.  I was in no mood for hot chocolate so I cooled down and ran to my car.  Once there I had to wait about 10 minutes to find a break in the walkers streaming by.  I hate when a race has parking that you can’t get out of until the thing is over.

The rest of the day was spent doing something, apparently forgettable.  Sunday I waited around for Red’s nap to run and it didn’t come until 3 p.m.  I got in a solid 7 miles and then ran another 3 after she went to bed.  Monday was a rest day.  Today was a cold, stiff 6 miles outside and another 2 miles on the treadmill.  I’m thinkin tomorrow will be treadmill as temperatures are going to be in the 20s.  yeesh, it’s only October.


You really smell like dog buns

At the last minute (ok, the day before), I decided to sign up for the local Pumpkin run or dash or whatever it was.  Stopped by the running store after my third trip to Target this week and signed up.  Red wanted to be put down so badly that it lead to a melt down while I waited for my bib and shirt.

The 8k didn’t start until 9:30, so I actually got to sleep in before I ran.  I left the house about 8:20 and ended up getting lost on the 20 minute drive.  So I arrived at 9 and parked haphazardly on a grassy hill at the park entrance.  The 4k had just started, so I watched them run by before I picked up my timing chip.  At that moment I was really wishing I was only running 4k, partly because it was cold, and partly because everyone looked like they were running in slow-mo.  I could’ve dominated that sucker.

I’ve been getting really bad nerves lately before races, probably because of my early summer disasters.  They are the nerves that make your stomach bloat and your bladder fill with pee even though you just pissed 3 minutes ago.  Well I had no time to pee, so I took off with the gun.  I immediately passed every women in front of me which had me really worried, but I didn’t feel like I was running too fast.  The local semi-pro runner had said she was just going to take it easy, but she still sprinted past me at the mile mark.  The first mile was 6:45, so I aimed to just stay consistent.  My goal was to finish in under 35 minutes.  No one was at the 2nd mile, so I don’t know how that one went, I’m guessing about 6:45 again.  The race was two loops of the park, so we passed the finish line and the halfway point somewhere in the 16s.  Mile three was 20:30, so I knew I was slowing down a bit but still on pace to break 35.  Still no one had passed me and I didn’t want to be a lame-o competitive person so I refused to turn around and look for other women.  Somewhere after the 3 mile point I was feeling dehydrated and I dry heaved a couple times.  I was also feeling really hot and regretted wearing two shirts.  That fourth mile lasted forever and I convinced myself that it was unmarked and I had already passed the 4 mile marker, but I was wrong.  I finally came to it at 27:25.  For the rest of the race I just kept telling myself that I had less than a mile to go, because 8k isn’t quite 5 miles.  I wasn’t sure how much less it was, but I had myself convinced it was a lot less.  It isn’t.  It’s like .03 less.  I started counting down orange cones and estimated that they were 100 meters apart.  Well they weren’t.  I counted about 15 and could see the finish line in the distance.  Some spectator told me I was the second woman but the third was about thirty yards behind me.  I have a terrible finishing kick, as in I have none whatsoever, but I tried.  Luckily I was able to come in about 20 seconds ahead of her.

My finish time was 33:55, so I beat my goal.  I was surprised about getting 2nd in women because the last time I ran it in 09 the first 3 were all under 33 minutes.  After the race, I jetted out of there before the awards ceremony, as usual.   When I checked online later that day I realized that I also won some CA$H money! So I best be picking it up sometime this week.  I’m using it to register for a 5k on Saturday.  Based on the 8k, I’m going to shoot for under 21 minutes.  I have run under 20 before, but I don’t feel like I have it in me.  Especially not on a cold day.



For I am the Duchess of Nuts

Red has been a bit of a butt lately.  I guess that comes with the territory when you have a new walker.  She walks everywhere.  Just does laps around the house.  Put shoes on her though and she reverts to crawling and then kicking and grabbing her feet.  She’s been a total daddy’s girl lately because I’m on day 9 of 12 straight days of work.

Went to a work conference last week for two days.  It was ok… I mean conference always give me some good ideas.  I wrote down some cool things to try but now I have spent the past 3 days catching up on stuff I missed while out of the office, so those new ideas no longer sound so appealing.  And I can no longer understand my chicken scratched notes either.  At least they didn’t have any motivational speakers at it.  Those people drive me nuts.  We had one at our work a few years ago and all the old Oprah fans were super into it.  “This is my negative free zone!”  They still have those signs posted by their desks where people often huddle and bitch about each other.

Despite my busy life, I have still been running well.  I couldn’t get up on Friday morning to run, but luckily I did make it out that night after 9.  I have super powers at night because I ran a mile warm-up, then a 5k in less than 22 minutes, then another mile at 7:20.  Too bad most races aren’t at night. My jello legs don’t like to move too fast in the morning.

Saturday I did take the full day off because it was rainy and I was overdue for one.  Sunday I forced my ass to do 10 miles.  It was rough.  It was still rainy, dark, and I wore my glasses.  Genius.  I was blind for 6 miles because I tried to wipe my lenses with my soaked shirt.  I ran directly into a bush and thought I was bleeding, but really I just had some leaves stuck to my leg.  I gave up running outside after 6 miles.  Then I hopped on the treadmill.  My legs felt like lead so I did two miles and decided to stop.  But then after about 5 minutes, I hopped back on and finally finished the last 2.   Monday I ran on the treadmill and forced myself to do a 10k in 44 minutes.  That is faster than the last 10k I raced, so now I need to figure out how to translate that into an actual running race pace.

This morning was another struggle.  I was so close to just laying on the couch and calling it a rest day.  Instead I ate some fudge at 5 in the morning and took off for an easy 5 miles.  Didn’t feel so easy.  I am so excited to go to the chiro on Friday.  I hope she is a wizard who can cure all my post marathon aches and pains and make my legs the same length again.  People at work think I am injured and I just have to tell them that no, I am just deformed and have one leg about an inch longer than the other.  Inserts are for pussies.

Lady you are ugly

I can’t even remember much of went on this past weekend.  Cause I was crazy partyin all day and night, right?  I woke up before 6 both days to run.  Ran ten and a half miles Saturday.  It was colder than a witches teet so I wussed out after 6 miles and hopped on the treadmill for the last bit.  On Sunday I didn’t even attempt to go outside, I just ran all 10 on the treadmill while watching Extreme Couponers.  I make fun of those silly people so much but secretly I am jealous.  Then again, they never buy any food that I would want to eat and I don’t drink sports drinks.

I attempted to watch my nephew’s flag football game on Sunday but Red had a freakout at the field.  I don’t know if it was the cold wind or the sun or the giant puffy jacket restricting her movements, but she was pissed.  So we holed up inside the rest of the night playing tea party and watching Adventure Time.

Monday morning I tried to get up and run but instead I fell back asleep on the couch until 7.  Luckily RKY was home so I convinced him to watch Red while I ran on the treadmill.  I was crunched for time before work, so I busted out 4.3 miles in 31 minutes.  Then on my break I came home and busted out another 2 in about 14:30.   This was impressive only because my break is 30 minutes and I had to drive home, change my clothes, run, change back, and eat dinner.  I made it back to work on time too with a glossy forehead and sweaty bra.

Today I have not run…yet.  I think I need a rest day because my foot is still being stupid and now my overcompensating hip is sore.  However, if Red falls asleep early, I may head out and do 5 or 6.  I have a conference that I need to leave early for on Thursday and Friday, so I want to make sure I get some good runs in before then.  I am signed up for zero more races this fall.  Fall is the perfect season for running but I can’t find any races that I really want to do.  I’m not into 5ks right now because there’s not enough miles to make up for a slow start.  No 10ks coming up.  blah..

I’m Randy Butternubs

Back from Disney.  It was a whirlwind trip except for the circling Chicago and sitting on the O’Hare tarmac for FOREVER.  The first night we got there we ate chicken quesadillas at the hotel’s cafeteria and then jetted err bussed off to Downtown Disney.  Women be shoppin’.

The next day we tried to beat the crowds to Animal Kingdom.  Don’t bother trying to beat the crowds to anywhere Disney.  There is always a crowd and you will always lose.  We booked it to Everest and they told us they were having technical difficulties…the only reason we came to this godforsaken land was to ride Everest!  We got fast passes but somehow my mom’s was a half hour later than mine.  We wandered over to the sorta cool Dinosaur ride and then hightailed it back to Everest which was working again.  We rode it three times then decided to pick up my race packet at ESPN.  That whole process took about 2 hours because the ESPN bus was like an endangered species.

The race shirt was totally ugz so I spent another 30 on a long sleeved I DID IT shirt.  People were lining up to get photos taken with Jeff Galloway WTF

Then we hit up Magic Kingdom for some Big Thunder Mountain Railroad.   Rode that a few times.  Shopped a bit.  Got tired of being pummeled by strollers so we went back to the hotel to chill.  My foot still hurt so I soaked them in a pool and took a nap.

The buses for the start always run ridiculously early so we ended up at Hollywood studios parking lot with almost 2 hours to kill.  We killed most of it in the portapotty line because my mom wouldn’t let me piss on a ‘Disney tree.’  The runners moved into the corrals and then we walked about a half mile to the starting line where they had that energizer bunny of a DJ making us dance gangham style.  I was in corral A so I was near the front and when the fireworks finally went of f, it only took about 20 seconds to cross the starting line.  My first mile was 6:50 and I was already drenched because of the jungle humidity.  My feet were killing me because I shoved them into my too small shoes that didn’t hurt the side of my foot where my tendon is strained, but sure as heck hurt my toes and arches.  I did the first 5k in 21 minutes which would be awesome if it were a 5k race.   But no I had to slog on through another 7 miles.  I don’t recall seeing any villains on the course other than the 3 hyenas from Lion King and a fake alligator by a lake.  Running through ESPN was cool because we circled their track and then the baseball field.  After that, it was another 2 miles of boring before we turned into Hollywood Studios.  That last mile was cool because of the crowds, but it felt really long.   At some point we left the park and then came back in behind the tower of terror so I couldn’t even really see it when we were finishing.  I finished in 73 minutes and whatever seconds.  I grabbed my medal and ate half a banana, then hurried out to meet my mom at Rock n Roller Coaster.

After riding Rock n 3 or 4 times, she finally convinced me to go on Tower of Terror.  HATE that ride.  Feels like my stomach is going to drop out of my ass.  Then we went to Star Tours and Toy Story.  By then it was almost 1:30 so we caught a bus back to the hotel.

Spent Sunday at Epcot.  Highlight–two words– Captain EO.  Oh and the Greek stand had delicious spanikopita.  Sunday night was spent at Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party.  Rode Big Thunder a few more times and then Space Mountain where a quick turn snapped my neck and gave me my weird crick back.  Couldn’t look left for the rest of the night.  Had way too much fun on the teacups.  Then came the downpour.  My mom bought me a poncho and then proceeded to laugh and call me a condom.  We gnawed a big ol turkey leg and then watched the parade and fireworks before crashing at the hotel.  The airport buses at Disney also come at an ungodly early time so we had to be waiting by 4:55 a.m.  The flights back were much smoother and coming home from O’Hare only took 25 minutes.

I ran again on Tuesday with stiff legs but now they are feeling better.   My foot is on and off.  Can’t figure out what to do other than rest it but that ain’t gonna happen.  Instead I’ve been icing and taking naproxen like candy.  Hoping to pull a ten miler out of my ass in the morning, but we’ll see.